The sun is still there…even if the clouds drift over it.
Once you have experienced the reality of sunshine you may weep, but you will never feel ice about your heart again. – Elizabeth Goudge
You seem like an angel with black wings because you spend so much of your time in darkness. You forgot what it feels like to breathe in the air that smells of July or to feel the warmth of Summer on your shoulders. Your bones are fused because the only thing you do is cry on the bathroom floor in your friend’s house. You feel like you are missing, and you don’t know where home is but you know it’s not here. You were meant to fly but you sit in silence in a dusty box under someone else’s bed because you miss them so much, but they go to sleep with peaceful dreams in their head, and none of them are of you. There are voices inside your skull and your heart feels cold, you could swear it’s turned to stone.
The air around your shoulders feels heavy, so you slouch, and the crown keeps falling. You’re afraid to wear it because of what other’s might say. You try to be soft because you know what hurt feels like, and god forbid anyone else feels that too, but you walk around like a hurricane anyway because any other form of existence is unfamiliar.
You forgot that you are a child within a body too big, it’s meant to be a soft blanket and not your shield. It’s big enough for two or three, or a whole crowd because love is an infinite space so don’t try to shut the door. The door is an illusion.
I know what they said, and they told you to be things you would soon regret. Don’t listen.
Hold on to your early morning coffee and your afternoon tea, the sunsets, and math class daydreams, because those are the things that make the world tick. Moments upon moments, just like that. Get out of your room and learn how to fly. You’ll fall first, don’t cry. Until then, keep trying to touch the sky. Your fingertips have gold on them for a special reason, you’re meant to touch hearts even if you don’t believe it, keep it. Keep searching for a reason to keep your heart beating because your smile makes someone’s day, and it’s true, so don’t fight it.
If it’s been a while and there has been no confession of love, please don’t feel sad, and trust that I know you and things will be great. I love you.
My only flaw is this; my hands are tied behind these words, and I feel confined, and I wish I could hold you until you feel like it’s alright. Do you feel that? That’s your heart. Please stand up, step into the light, and remember that soon you’ll find a home, your tribe, in a world of seven billion, and until then, paint your wings white.
After all, you are a child of Light.
p.s you are already who you want to be.